Wednesday, October 29, 2008

Everything Matters - 10/29/08 - Morning Edition

So you do know that there is no Mrs. Joe the Plumber. Something about the
male threading on his pipes not really fitting into the female threading on hers.

Obama’s got a half hour campaign ad on TV tonight which people are calling
“very special”. Just what we need, another “very special” episode where Uncle
Obama talks to the cast of Two and a Half Men about the dangers of unsafe sex
and teenage drinking.

Doesn’t Joe the Plumber look like the giant gladiator Tigris of Gaul who’s sent
in to fight and kill Russell Crowe in Gladiator? But he ends up dead with the
sword in his foot? Raise your hands – how many of you would like to see
Joe the Plumber with a sword in his foot? Or to get him to shut the fuck up –
in his mouth?!

So you do know that there is no Mrs. Joe the Plumber. Something about his
pipes leaking early before her faucets were actually turned on.

McCain is having a Joe the Plumber rally at a lumberyard in Florida.
Obama had a crowd of a hundred thousand in Denver the other day and
a week before the election McCain is speaking before a hundred guys in Florida
with toolbelts and visible buttcracks. And all of them thinking the same thing –
“How do I get a shot at laying some pipe into Cindy McCain?”

Sarah Palin gave a speech on energy policy this morning where she said
we need to build 45 more nuclear power plants. Actually she said 45
“nuke-u-ler” power plants. Hey, crazy lady, if you can’t fucking say it you
can’t fucking build it!!!

Palin did say what she’d do with the nuclear waste generated by those
45 “nuke-u-ler” power plants she wants to build.And she listed – New York,
San Francisco, Washington, D.C…

2 comments:

Unknown said...

woo obamaaaa!!!

hey did'ya ever end up using the 12days of the election?

Andy said...

Hiiiiiiiiiiyyyyyaaaaaaaaaaaa!!! Nice speech lolzzz..Two and a half men is sort of a formula sit com.There is about a laugh every ten minutes, and it's more of a polite laugh than something spontaneous.